Upstaged by a phone...

I think I must be one of the few remaining people in this world who has not gone ga-ga over the new iPhone.

I mean seriously, I like gadgets and all but hey... it is a PHONE. Alright... it's quite a lot more than a phone but it's still a piece of communication hardware.

I have more heart and (with any luck) more charm than this 4ins by 2ins piece of kit, but on more than one occasion in the last few weeks I've been cast into the shadows.

The last time was in New York just two weeks ago. There me and a mate were hanging out at some red neck bar on the trendy Upper West Side hoping a couple of hotties would pick up on our Hugh Grant-esque accents.

Sadly it wasn't the accent, dress sense or lure of a drink that attracted them in our general direction - it was Joe's iPhone.

"Wow," one big-eyed beauty cooed at him.

"How do you keep the screen so clean. And don't you wish it could do more?

"Hey have you heard about the iPhone and what it can do?"

My opening gambit: "AHEM".

No response.

For the next 30 minutes or so I was upstaged. A modern age man outclassed by a gadget of the modern world.

Does anyone really care enough to hold half-hour-long conversations about a phone?!

"I can get online to look at Myspace or Facebook whenever I want and wherever I am..." was entered into the conversation somewhere along the line.

Who cares, I thought. With all the means and ends to contact people all over the world at any given time, does no-one yet crave the anonymity or escape?

I know I do.

Yes, I'm happy with my Eriksson. Ok, it won't give me a pinpoint GPS position on my every move allowing me to get to places easier, ok it won't allow me to flip it over and see the cute drunken picture of a random wall at a different angle, and ok it doesn't look THAT sexy and cost some extortionate amount of money, but you know what? I really don't care.

It's a phone and a phone should stay a phone as a phone is. Ok we're a generation of consumers and what we desire ultimately determines what we're offered but somewhere along the line things have gone mad.

You know O2 phoned me last week offering me an upgrade.

"So Mr Nichols, what would you like your phone for? Its camera or its walkman qualities?"
"Er... now let me think" I replied.

"How about for A PHONE?!" Jeez...

Rant over. Apologies for the period of time since my last blog. Been away and tad poorly ever since.

Oh as a new addition I've added the weekly games chart below.


While waiting for your new iPhone give these a glance:


Title: Space Invaders Extreme

Platform: Nintendo DS

Genre: Arcade

Price: £19.99

Hit Count: 4/5

Would you believe that one of the all-time classic games is now 30 years old? It’s high time for a revamp and Space Invaders Extreme delivers in almost every way.

This is a serious arcade update with real 21st century polish – those 2D aliens have now got some crazy 3D backgrounds and four cheeky power-ups take the action to a whole different level.

Plus, in pursuit of top points, chain attacks and, of course, the obligatory world No. 1 ranking thanks to the wonder of wi-fi, the competitive edge will never let up.

Those who have never played the original may want to glance back through the decades for nostalgic purposes, but Space Invaders Extreme shows the series has an exciting future.


Title: Wall: E

Platform: Xbox 360

Genre: Action / Adventure

Price: £39.99

Hit Count: 3/5

It’s summer time and Disney Pixar’s Wall: E is looking set to top the bill when it comes to animated movies.

With the world ravaged by pollution and rubbish, little Wall:E and his pall Eve are left in charge of cleaning the planet up while humans take a space-age vacation.

These two characters provide the focus for what turns out to be a pretty enjoyable platform adventure that will be loved by fans of the film.

More discerning gamers will spot the below-par graphics and audio, but may also uncover an excellent co-operative multiplayer mode. It’s decent, but nothing out of this world.


Title: Secret Agent Clank

Platform: PSP

Genre: Action

Price: £24.99

Hit Count: 3/5

People have been booming around the Ratchet and Clank universe for some years now, so a little spice is required to keep the franchise fresh.

Taking cues from spy classics of the past, Secret Agent Clank presents their world with a spy themed twist, including Clank as the Galaxy’s greatest undercover agent dressed in a tuxedo.

With gadgets ranging from Cufflink Bombs to the Tie-arang and Clank-Fu, Clank’s very own style of martial arts, this is an absolute hoot.

Stealth, action, platforming and full-on fighting sequences will keep you entertained for hours, leaving your PSP shaken and stirred.


Title: Command & Conquer: Kane’s Wrath

Platform: Xbox 360

Genre: Strategy

Price: £29.99

Hit Count: 3/5

The Command & Conquer series has been a stalwart real-time-strategy selection for PC gamers down the years but has struggled to make a real impact on consoles, mainly because of the need to revise the control system in the absence of a mouse.

Kane’s Wrath on Xbox 360 does a good job of trying to rectify that with the CommandStick, although moving round maps still feels trickier than it should.

Overall, the game is what you’d expect – action-packed strategy with that familiar C&C seal of quality – but there’s little doubt it’s still best suited to PC.


Title: Naruto Ultimate Ninja Heroes 2

Platform: PSP

Genre: Fighting

Price: £29.99

Hit Count: 4/5

The original Ultimate Ninja Heroes did a fine job of bringing the fighting sensation to the handheld scene, and this sequel is equally spectacular, boasting the great anime graphics and sound snatched straight from the popular TV series.

Story mode sees you scrapping your way through a host of hefty challenges and the ever-popular multiplayer mode allows you to set up some of the must-see battles that fans will be salivating over.

All things considered it’s another strong entry to the Naruto series.

PSP owners would do well to lay their hands on one.


In the charts this week the top three held firm in the same place, while Wii Fit tumbled three places from four to seven.

GAMES CHART ALL FORMATS FULL PRICE

1.Super Smash Bros. Brawl
2.Battlefield Bad Company
3.LEGO Indiana Jones: Original Adventures
4.Big Beach Sports
5.Beijing 2008
6.Top Spin 3
7.Wii Fit
8.Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games
9.Wii Play
10.The Bourne Conspiracy